Ever found yourself caught in a vicious cycle of guilt and confusion when you take a step back from your business, only to find yourself drawn back in? Well, you're not alone. I, Jacob K Mead, want to share my battle with this insidious 'circle of death'. It's the guilt of distancing oneself from the daily operations of the business, falling back into the comfort of the familiar, and getting swamped by an endless to-do list. This is a battle I struggle with daily, despite knowing my team is adept at running things smoothly.
I'm here to tell you it’s okay to step out of the trenches. There’s no need to feel guilty about leaving your business in the capable hands of your team. It’s not about working in your business but working on it! In this episode, I share strategies to break free from this guilt trap. Learn the importance of a good support system, taking meaningful breaks, and trusting your team with the same vision you hold. Remember, growth happens outside our comfort zones. Tune in and let’s explore together how we can overcome the guilt of stepping away, granting our businesses the room they need to thrive. I’m here to support you on this journey.
Hey everybody, this is Jacob K Mead, and this is the Buy Time podcast, where we discuss everything there is to know about buying back your time. Be sure to like and follow and share with somebody who needs to buy back their time. Enjoy today's episode. My name is Jacob K Mead and I'm excited that you're here today, because I want to talk about something that I've struggled with, still do a little bit to this day, and it's something that is really hard to overcome. It almost requires a different mindset shift, and what I'm talking about is the circle of death. Now, before you lay into me like, what are you talking about? I'm not going to die, no, no, you're not, at least not in this present moment. But what I am talking about is one of the steps in the buying time process, and that includes when you step away and when you get to that point of being able to have your business run on its own and you're not having to be there every single day. You know your team can handle it. You know if there's something that comes up that it can be taken care of. So you're not having to be there every single day. You still may go in every now and then, but you're not having to be there constantly. But when you get to that point, what happens is you start to get this overwhelming fear of guilt, like I should be supporting them, I should be there, I should be working side by side with them. Now I'm guilty of this, right. I have this happen to me a lot, actually more often than I probably should, especially since I do a lot of coaching on the buying time right, but it still happens to me, and even to this day, and almost like even this episode, for instance, that I'm recording. Right now I'm in Nashville, tennessee, and my business is running into Moyniah, iowa, but I still have a little sense of guilt of I should be doing more for my team. Now, what's amazing is I can get on social media, I can get on my email and I can see how great they're doing. I can see that my team is actually thriving without me being there. And they message me every now and then and they'll tell me like hey, we miss you, we can't wait to hear your stories and we can't wait to hear what you're doing and what you're up to. And I love that about them because it means that they understand the bigger picture and they understand what I'm doing, what I'm trying to accomplish, and they also understand that they're part of that goal, like they're part of that, like they're part of my work family, like they are helping me and in return, I always tell them I'm going to help you and I do. I help them in any way possible. Now I talk about this death trap. So what do I mean by a death trap or like a death circle? Right, it really comes down to what you do when you have that feeling of guilt. See, what I did for the longest time is I would have that feeling of guilt, and then what I would do is I would look to see what would comfort me, right, and I knew that going back into work was a quick solution and a quick comfort. And so I would find myself off there, not living with this sense of guilt for a couple days and then saying I can't do this anymore. And then going back to work inside the business and not getting anything that I needed done, my to-do list piling right back up again, getting stressed out that I'm not able to figure out how to scale this and how to move it in the next direction. And then I would say, okay, well, now I have to step back outside. So then I would go and I would step outside of my business to try and get all that stuff accomplished, and then the feeling of guilt would kick back in and it was just a constant circle. It was like that, and that's why I call it the death circle, because you go from stepping outside of your business and letting your team handle everything, letting the systems that you put in place work, to having that sense of guilt. And because you have that sense of guilt, you want comfort. And often times or not, we find comfort in what we know. And for the longest time, like for me, all I knew was my business. I knew how to work in it and I knew that it made me feel comfortable and comforted. And so I went towards that comfort, right Cause it's a comfortable feeling, it's something that you know, and so I would go towards that comfort. But in return, what did I get? I got temporary comfort, because I now had a big to-do list piling on top of trying to figure out how to scale a company, because that's our job as business owners. Our job is to look at our business and to see where it can grow. And I like to say this, cause I have two kids at home. Your business is your baby, and I actually heard this on one of my other podcast episodes, where they mentioned that your business is your baby, and it really is. It's your baby. But the most important step of whenever you have a kid is when you get them to the point of where they're moving off to college. So they have their bags packed and they're moving off to college. Now you would always welcome your kid back, right. If your kid needed you or needed a place of comfort, you'd welcome them back. But what would become a bad habit is that if it always happened where there was a constant circle and they couldn't learn how to be comforted without going back home, right. And so that's the way I look at it in my aspect of life, and I struggle with this today. I'm not here saying that I'm perfect, cause I'm not. I'm gonna be honest with you all. I'm not. I'm far from it. I've learned a lot of business lessons. Absolutely. I've gone through a lot of struggles. Absolutely. I still go through struggles. But I really just wanted to address that death circle, because if you get stuck into that, you're never going to continue to grow. So what are some things that I do? Well, first of all, make sure you have a good support partner. So my wife Sabrina, bless her heart. She is the best person in the entire world and I honestly don't know what I do without her, because she is that person that re-grounds me. She's that person that'll call it out how it is. She's that person that she catches me working 60, 70 hour weeks in my store and not on my business. She will call me out and she will say, hey, why are you going in so much? And then I have my list of excuses cause, again, I'm feeling comfortable, and she'll say, no, that's not good enough. You need to do what you said. You're going to do Almost as a practice, what you preach, kind of method. And so she holds me so accountable. And then I obviously have a business coach and he holds me accountable. And I have mindset mentors and they hold me accountable. And then you know, fitness is a huge role in it too. So I have a fitness coach and all of these people in my life hold me accountable and kind of keep me out of that death circle. Something I am just now trying to learn to do is more, take breaths, take pauses, and that's also helping. It's helping me to realize that things will continue to go on. I'm doing the right thing, and my employees know that I'm doing the right thing, and that makes me feel comforted, and I have to once re ground myself in that way to know like they whether I believe it or not they can also see the goal right along with me, and I know that because of the conversations we have. I know that because of what they message me and how they always tell me, when I do show up, that they got this and they hold me accountable too. If I'm there, they'll tell me hey, what are you doing? You can't be here. You have stuff to get done, and I love that. It's so important to have that support team, because otherwise you'll get stuck in that death circle and just go around and around and it's so hard to get out of that. So that's really what I wanted to talk to you guys about today, and hopefully you found some knowledge in that. If you're struggling with this or if it's something you want to talk a little bit further on, feel free to reach out to me. I'm on all the social medias. At jacobkmedecom, you can find me online at jacobkmedecom and you can just go on there and we can have a conversation and feel free to message me. I just really like connecting with each and every one of you and if you think that this would be a beneficial podcast for maybe one of your friends or business partners or business acquaintance, feel free to share it with them. That's what you guys can do to help me out and in return, I'd love to help you guys in any way possible. I'm here to try to provide as much support as possible. Guys, really just thank you so much for all you do and remember that continue to find ways to work on your business, not in it. Make sure that you're focusing on buying back your time. I'm Jacob K Meade, I'm your host, and until next time. Thanks for listening to today's episode. My name is Jacob K Meade, and until next time.